2010 in the end

This is not the way to start a new year – or the way for the previous one to end.  2010 was a horrible year and we were only too happy to see its end on the horizon.  Unfortunately it went clawing tooth and nail like a wildcat slipping into a well and made certain one remaining casualty would haunt the first day of what should have been a happy new year.

There was no countdown, no champagne, no celebration.  Only the sadness of family so emotionally and physically exhausted too confused by the state of family stricken down in an instant.  There were no party hats, no music, no resolutions.  Only anger at the injustice of it all and the unfairness of losing someone who deserved to live more than just 46 years.

But to the year of 2010 I say piss off – you will never be missed.  Yes, you spoiled these first days/weeks/months of our new beginning in 2011 but no matter how hard things are now we will carry on.  Prayers fail, begging fails, pleading fails and we know that life is just life and that we are on our own.  How we handle things now, then and forever are ours to own and no one else’s to lay blame.

Life is short. Be good to one another and to yourself.  And hope that those around you do the same.  We’re all each other have.

Life List

I’ve decided to participate in my first Topical Tuesday and the topic for the day is Life List.  As stated on that page: “This weeks challenge is to write a Life List of ten things you would like to do before you die. Only ten mind – make them count.”  That’s a tall order.  Ten things I want to do before I die?  I want to do everything before I die.  If you do them after you die then who would know?

Well, here’s my attempt.  This is going to take some brain strain.

  1. Visit Europe.  Anywhere in Europe is fine although I’m particularly interested in England, Ireland, Scotland, Iceland, Czech Republic, Austria and Turkey.
  2. Get a six figure income.  Bonus points if it starts with a number higher than one.
  3. Live long enough to see my baby girl grow up to be a happy and successful woman and hopefully watch some grandbabies grow up.
  4. Make a positive and profound impact on the lives of other people.  My dream job is to be a philanthropist.
  5. Go on a road trip from one coast of the United States to the opposite coast.
  6. Retire early enough that I might get to enjoy some time off before I die.  By the time I’m 65, the retirement age will probably be 130.
  7. Have something published and sold – even if it’s not successful.  A novel, comic or screenplay I suppose.
  8. Become passably fluent in a second language.
  9. Ride at least five of the  fastest roller-coasters in the world.  Preferably in at least two different countries.
  10. Own and operate a bar & grill or a pub of my own design.

Wow.  That was a lot harder than I thought it would be with narrowing it down to only ten entries.  So many things come to mind but with only ten spots its hard to pick the things that would actually mean something to me in a way that was more than just saying, “OK that’s done” and then checking it off a list and never thinking about it again.

It’s March already

It’s March already.  March 2nd to be exact.  Ten days away from another birthday and another day closer to the grave.  Yeah, not much activity on here lately.  No real posts this year and not much towards the end of last year.  No revival over at A Little Scary and if you follow me on Facebook, Twitter or Plurk then you know I’ve not been very active in those areas either.  I’m well aware – and most of the time I’m OK – with that.

I guess my priorities changed.  Having a toddler, yeah Kira is almost 16 months old now, means having a lot less free time.  A lot less freedom too.  If I have free time, I usually just want to relax or play a video game or maybe watch a movie.  There are a hundred and one things I’d like to do but I just don’t have the time or ambition to do them all and sometimes that means I don’t do any of them.  Writing is one of those things.  Drawing is another.  Sculpting, I finally started and will hopefully post some pictures of my first piece (in progress).  Reading, playing, sorting, organizing, learning, designing… all things that don’t happen all that much.

Now I know that there are people out there who go to work full time, go to school, work out and still take care of their kids.  I have the utmost respect for those people.  I have no idea how they do it.  I want to be like that.  I just don’t know how.

I watch things like Extreme Makeover: Home Edition on television and say to myself “I want to do things that impact people like that.”  But I don’t have – or at least make – the time to better myself.  How can I expect to make the lives of others better if I don’t even make my own life better?  I don’t know.

Is this whining?  I’m not sure.  Is this a plea for help?  I have no idea.  Is it me venting and just spinning my wheels in the life I have put myself in?  Yeah, probably.  What do I do about it all?  I don’t know.

I want the easy way out.  I want to win the lottery so I can quit my job and become a philanthropist.  But I don’t even buy lottery tickets but a handful of days out of the year.  I guess that shows how much faith I have in the “easy way”.

It’s easier to be a “dreamer” instead of a “doer”.  I’m guilty of both.  What about you?


Oh.  Hey.  Look at that.  It’s 2010.


Well… that’s done.  Carry on.

Overdue updates

OK, so much for my updating at least once a week idea. Work has been a little busier lately and Michelle hasn’t been feeling 100% all the while Kira seems to be developing a temper as a couple more teeth start ripping through her gums.

I’m glad I don’t remember that process.  They say that is one of the worst pains ever but truthfully how would you know?  Babies can’t tell you how it feels or how it compares to childbirth, root canals or drawn and quartering.  You can’t hook them up to a meter and see the pain on a graph.  I guess it’s like most things… a guess.

Michelle and I took a little time last weekend away from the baby and went to have lunch at Red Lobster and then off to see Zombieland.  If you haven’t seen Zombieland yet then you are truly missing out.  It’s funny, goofy, scary (stupid clown), self-deprecating, a bit gory and full of action.  There’s even a touching moment so there’s something for everyone.  Meaning emotionally touching… not inappropriately touching…  you know what I mean.

I’ve got a bunch of vacation days that need to be taken before the end of the year so I am figuring out how to plan that out.  Everytime I think I have it all sorted something new comes up.  It happened again today.  Urgh.

Oh, I have a Playstation 3 now!  Yay!  Although I really don’t have any games for it.  I got it used on eBay and it did come with Street Fighter 4 (which I really don’t like surprisingly) and Singstar (which is kinda fun but quite limited compared to other music games).  So I don’t count those.  I’m hoping to get the Game of the Year edition of Little Big Planet for Christmas because that just looks fun to me.  Maybe I should download the demo and try it out first but it seems interesting.  Plus God of War 3 will be out eventually although since the main guy involved in the first two is no longer part of the franchise I’m not holding my breath.

I got the old 60GB PS3 which is why I got it on eBay instead of going to the store.  I picked that one specifically because it is the only model that has the hardware emulation for both PS1 andPS2 games built-in.  So of course the first thing I did was play We Love Katamari.  Because I just can’t get enough of rolling stuff into balls.  Don’t ask because I don’t know.

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