Archive for September, 2009


Tuesday, September 15th, 2009

I took last Friday off as a vacation day and got up before dawn.  4:15am to be exact.  I showered and packed the cooler and my toothbrush and blearily drove to my buddy’s house to load everything in his car.  We were going camping.

After some amazement at the amount of stuff we were going to have to pack into his Accord and the thought that we still had to pick up another guy and his gear, we headed out and eventually got everything and everyone settled.  The sun was up by then.  I was hungry.

We drove and drove and drove some more.  Stopped at Jack in the Box for some food that we would later regret and drove some more.  Once we reached the middle of nowhere we made a right and headed straight for Ozark Country.  The Accord deftly zipped around horse trailers and logging trucks.  I was too tired to care much.

We had to wait almost two hours for a group to show up and then boarded the bus for a very noisy ride many miles away.  Cubs fans were made fun of.  Laughter ensued.  We loaded up the canoes and floated about eight miles to the campsite where some more friends were already setup and waiting for us.  They had kayaked down the day before to make sure they got the spot they wanted.  Crazy bastards.

It was a beautiful weekend where I derided anyone for checking their watches.  I caught a few fish and generally relaxed.  I was bored now and then and I couldn’t nap when I wanted to because my tent was like an oven.  The water was ice cold so there was no recreational swimming.  But it was still nice.

By dinner on Saturday night I was taking two Immodium because I didn’t want to experience again the horror that happened after lunch earlier that day.  Dig a hole and cover it up.  Hah! Tell that to the rehydrated Chili Mac that was coming out one way or the other.  No more pooping in the woods for me thankyouverymuch.  I’d rather be medicinally constipated.

It took three tries to get my tent back in the small bag it came out of on Sunday morning.  We sat around till lunch and shot the shit and packed up the canoes and kayaks after eating.  It took a few hours and some serious paddling and we were back at the pull out site.  We were tired, smelly and I wanted to get home and see my family.

We packed up the Accord once more with slightly less than we had arrived with.  We left Ozark Country with fresh clothes on our backs but still in need of a serious scrubbing.  We made a left at the middle of nowhere and headed home once more.

Shopping list

Wednesday, September 9th, 2009

I’m taking a vacation day on Friday to go on a float/camping trip with some friends this weekend.  I have to be at my friend’s house at 5:30am in order to pick up another guy and make it to the middle of nowhere by 8:30am to catch our ride.  It’s not exactly peak season right now for floats so we were given the impression that we really REALLY need to be at the rental office by 8:30am.  I don’t think there will be any other trips out that day.

So I’ve been shopping a bit.  When your stuff has been in storage for a couple of years you start to forget what you did and did not keep.  Important stuff – like a tent.  Yeah I used to have a nice tent but it no longer exists.  It had gotten a few holes in it from over-acheiving bonfire builders a few years previously so I have the vague recolection that maybe we sold it at the garage sale.  Either way – we were tentless.  So that went on the list.

I bought some travel toilet paper because that went missing from my supplies and that is a serious must have.  Sure I could have just taken a whole roll of TP, but the kind made for camping is much smaller and has it’s own little carrying case.  Now if only I could find a camp chair with no bottom for me to sit on.  How am I supposed to hold myself up, poop and read in the middle of the woods?  The idea of taking care of things in the woods is not completely alien to me but this is the first time I have had to “plan” for pooping in the woods.

No I need to go to the store and pick up some bottled water, beer, snacks, something to burn for Friday night’s dinner and some breakfast-y type stuff.  And get my fishing license.  Can’t forget that otherwise I may as well not even take my fishing pole.  License enforcement happens all the time.  Some other stuff too I think.  I better make a new list.

Tuesday like a Monday

Tuesday, September 8th, 2009

The Tuesday after a Monday holiday always feels like a Monday.  Which of course makes sense because no matter what day it really is, it’s your first day back in the office with the rest of the world and everybody is playing catch-up from the long weekend.  It’s a short week but stuff still has to be done.

This week is especially short for me though.  Not only did I have yesterday off as a holiday, I am taking Friday off as a vacation day to go on the float/camping trip.  Some vacation day that will be too.  I will have to get up before the sun even wakes up to get my kit together and drive to my friends house.  He offered to come by and pick me up but honestly that is a BAD idea.  The dogs go crazy when anyone comes around the house.  If Kira was startled awake at 5:30am by insane dog barking, I’m afraid that would mean a very long and unpleasant day for both her and Michelle.  And she thinks I don’t think about her.  Pbbpttbt….

Did you see this article?  A guy in Arizona wears animal masks to and from work every day in order to get out of paying tickets from the photo-enforcement division.  Clever I suppose.  Well, until they start staking out his house.  Hehe.  Read the article.  It’s funny.

This picture just cracks me up every single time I see it.  Ha!  I am partial to monkeys though so maybe that has something to do with it.

Not that there’s anything wrong with that…

Thursday, September 3rd, 2009

Facebook – scourge of the internet and destroyer of productivity.  Or at least that’s how I look at it.  Those of you who use it know what I mean.  The people, the games, the mind-numbing refreshes to see what happens next.  But I saw something funny today.

Do you ever look at the ads on the side of page?  Usually they are like Google ads where they are at least kind of targeted to what’s on the page.  Usually.  Not today though.  Today I was looking at all the responses to me announcing that I am no longer playing any more farming games.  If you don’t know what I’m going on about then you probably aren’t on Facebook.  And I look to the side and see this as one of the ads:

All Gay CruisesUhhh… I think perhaps the targeted ads are a bit confused.  If this has something to do with farming then I don’t need to know about it.

Seriously though, I have nothing against gay people of either gender but this bothers me a bit.  Based on my own knowledge of gay guys that I have met or been friends with, the bulk of them seemed to have no problem flitting between lovers like a fat guy at a buffet and certainly had no qualms about cheating on each other.  I am certain that this is not the case with all gay guys and I am not trying to generalize but I am relating what I have been told personally.

Now, assuming that the kind of behaviour I describe is even relatively common in this lifestyle, this gay cruise idea sounds like a really really bad idea.  Sure it will be a fun time for the people on it but can you imagine the aftermath?  Primarily I’m talking about diseases.

Consider that most sexually transmitted diseases are spread by people who don’t know they are infected or carrying a given disease.  I’m not sure if there is a statistic on how many people get an STD over a given weekend but I imagine its more than I care to know.  Now take that number and multiply it by some other unknown number for a cruise that I assume is based on the premise of sex.  It sounds like the boat should have to go through quarantine before it gets back to US soil.

Am I wrong about an All Gay Cruise being primarily about sex?  I don’t think so or why else would it exist?  There’s nothing to say that gay people and straight people can’t share the same cruise ship for the experience of people going on vacation.  And can you imagine if someone offered an All Straight Cruise?  The backlash would be earth-shattering to say the least.  So since there is nothing stopping gay people from going on normal cruises and doing whatever they feel like, this idea of an All Gay Cruise sounds more like a “special” getaway.  A haven or retreat for the alternative lifestyle.  A place to do whatever it is they feel that can’t do when us “breeders” are around.  (Yes I have been called a Breeder by a gay guy before.)

Am I way off base here?  Or is there something even more sinister that I’ve completely missed?
What’s your opinion?

Hello obscurity

Tuesday, September 1st, 2009

It seems that this poor site has been neglected one too many times over the years.  I have officially fallen into the dark realms of obscurity on the internet.  My stats seem unrecoverable.  No one wants to advertise here even for free.  It’s a sad place to be.  But I’ve been mucking up the place since November of 2000 (wow, almost nine years?) so I don’t believe I’ll be giving this place up just yet.

Today is September 1st and I’m doing fairly well at updating again.  I just need to get into that groove again that seems to rise and fall like a perfect wave.  Once I can get that going I’ll start on other projects again.